I wrote this 5 1/2 months ago… at that time I was still getting into a routine, so posting seemed like the last thing I needed to be doing with my time. Now things are more regular and I have a little extra free time when she is napping:)
This morning as I sat nursing Fiona in my rocking chair, many thoughts came flooding into my mind. I began to look at her little face which gets chubbier by the day and pondered each little part. The glowing lamplight revealed the fuzz on the ends of her little ears. Her little button nose was nearly touching me, her big eyes slightly rolling around in mesmerization and delight, her chubby cheeks sucked furiously and then slowed to a suckle and her sweet hand was resting on mine in love.
I looked into my daughter’s face and was flooded with a feeling of unworthiness in being blessed with her precious little soul to raise. I tried to imagine what the years ahead will hold- what she will look like when she is two years old- what her personality will be- the questions she will ask- starting to home school her- trips we will take as a family- her first cooking attempts- her 16th birthday- Lord willing, her courtship and marriage, and I started to get very overwhelmed! Then I realized that I’m not in any of those places right now. I have a lovely three and a half month old baby who I can enjoy right now and I need not be anxious about the future. So I sat a few minutes longer and thanked God for the blessing of having a daughter and enjoyed holding her warm little body close to mine. Ah! The joys of motherhood!!